Hey everyone, welcome to a very special milestone—our 300th episode of Just a Guy in the Pew! 🎉
In this episode, Victor and I take a moment to reflect on five incredible years of sharing our hearts, our struggles, and our faith with you all. From the very first episode to now, this journey has been full of raw conversations about vulnerability, faith, and the real challenges we face as men. We’ve laughed, we’ve learned, and we’ve seen how God has worked through this ministry to touch the lives of so many.
If you’re new here, this podcast isn’t about perfect people or perfect answers. It’s about real guys, talking about real life, in front of the one person who can truly make a difference—Jesus Christ. Our hope is that by sharing our stories, we can help you find hope in yours.
Thank you to everyone who has been a part of this journey so far. If this message resonates with you, I encourage you to hit that subscribe button and join us as we continue to grow this ministry. Together, we can reach even more men who need to know they’re not alone in their walk of faith.
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. . . . some stuff around the house there and you said, Hey man. Dude, we gotta do, we gotta do a show, because I gotta leave. I gotta be out, this weekend, I gotta go to all these places. I said, okay. And he said, by the way, it’s 300. I’m like, I thought to myself, I was like, has it been 300 shows? And we operate like one show a week, pretty much.
If you think that’s 300 weeks almost of actually putting out product, but also formulating the show and a topic that kind of like would resonate with people who listen rather than us talking about, like me talking about how to pull weeds correctly in a garden, which is like what I love doing.
I, it’s the same thing, right? I’m a guard, I like garden and stuff, and hopefully one day have my own greenhouse. So if anyone would donate something for Christmas present for Vic, a garden spade or something. But yeah, so I was excited to come because you said, Hey man, just, let’s just vibe on this, let’s just see, let’s just celebrate, be present, but also, let everybody else that listens to us over time to know what it’s like sitting here on the side of the mic and how excited we are, but how happy we are that they listen.
And also just really what we’ve learned over time. Yeah, sure. And that’s the thing, man, like you’re right. 300 episodes is a lot. We usually spend an hour and a half, In here, whether the shows aren’t always that long, but the time we’re sharing and Discussing what we’re going to do and stuff like that and it’s just been such a joy man It’s 300 episodes.
Like I keep getting the image of that 300 movie with the greek You know, it just keeps coming. I don’t know i’m the guy that gets killed the first shot. Yeah, hopefully somebody survives But no it’s been a great journey and, I was sitting here when it came up, Derek who works with us in the ministry, he does all the marketing and the backend stuff.
And, he does the thumbnails and one of the last ones he was showing me, it just caught my eye. I was like, man, it’s 298. We just did the episode with Dr. Bob that came out last week about the Restored Men’s Conferences that I hope everybody will check out. But I was like, dude, we can’t, I can’t have, I An episode 300 without with anybody, but you, we’ve had guests on and plenty of guests and all that stuff and been so blessed.
But yeah, looking back, like I just, I knew this episode had to be with you in this episode today is not Anything other than us just reflecting on The last number of years. This started in I think we uploaded our first episode in 2017, you know late 2017 early 2018 and back then that started with Deacon Jeff, basically me being in a Cursillo group with him.
I was a recent convert too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And Deacon Jeff and I were in the same Cursillo group and cause I’d gone to Cursillo before you did, a bunch of us did at the time you weren’t able to make that week. Yeah. And so I was meeting with him and Tom Dorian and Mike Bishop and a bunch of other people and walking out of the bowling alley one night, Deacon Jeff was like, okay, man.
Cause every week I was just sharing about what we were doing in the men’s group. We had started Holy Rosary and all the men’s lives were being transformed and how just all this amazing stuff was happening out of nothing right out of our brokenness and just God calling us to do something.
And Jeff was like, Deacon Jeff was like, I think, I want to build you a podcast and I remember laughing in the parking lot and going dude, get out of here. Yeah, I’ll see you next week. You’ve had a beer or something like, you’re not thinking straight. And he was like, no, every time you come in here and all these amazing things are happening and I think what you are doing could help a lot of other people besides the ones in the room.
And so he was like, what are you going to call it? And I just spewed just a guy in the pew. And that came from, when father Martel took me under his wing and I was going to mass every day when I was in my time off from work after I’d been arrested and all my drug rehab and stuff. And people would come up to me every day and just say, are you in the deaconate or are you in the seminary?
And I’d say, no, I’m just a guy in the pew. So when he asked me that, that’s where the name came from. And he just said you need a cohost. And so I went and prayed about it. And I thought, man, Victor has this background of faith. You’d been to seminary in the Protestant world and you had a great understanding of the Bible and a love for knowledge and even the desert fathers and things like that, even when you weren’t even Catholic yet.
And. Man, I just, I never thought like in that parking lot when we said yes to that. And when we were meeting at St. Louis church and Deacon Jeff’s Catholic cafe studio, that we would ever be sitting here in a studio now in my home with a YouTube channel and traveling the world and doing all these things.
And it’s just, man, I want to thank you personally to start off with, because you’ve been such a big part of this ministry. And I couldn’t do this every week without nor would I want to. And there’s so many people that come up to me when we’re out places. And when I’m out. Speaking or doing events and you’re like, man, how’s Vic?
And what’s Vic like? And tell Vic, we said, hi, go Florida state and all that stuff. You were in the Memphis hat today, but they love you, man. And I do too. And I just, this episode is just, I just want us to talk, man. And just to share memories and let people into some of the backside of this and.
Maybe go through some of our favorite, look back on some of our favorite episodes or jokes or things that happened and go from there. But I had to be doing this with you for the 300th time. Yeah. Same here. And you’re talking about flashbacks with Dick and Jeff Drozimski, cause he has Catholic cafe and so he was doing that for a long time.
So when we walked onto set, it was almost like, cause he’s, he goes EWTN and he had yeah. I don’t know, a million listeners, followers. And so for me, I was like, he asked me, I’m like, man, John, this is going to, after the first episode, he’s gonna realize, yeah, Vic, thanks for showing up, buddy, but we’ll reevaluate this, but because, I, it was always like a thing let’s just talk about where we are in our group.
And I think a lot of. Our basis topics for the early shows is we found out what men were struggling with in the group. And some people have been from the beginning. Those are the first couple of 12 podcasts where there’s a thing called a bag where, we had 20 guys and whatnot.
And we write a piece of paper, what is something that is, that you’re struggling with the most? And it could be from anything, from anger, from too much time at work, not enough drinking, pornography, or not spending enough time with family. These things where I love work and And I want to be in my family, but for some reason I just can’t, I can’t be present, and those are all like really down to life, like gritty questions of I’ve done all these things. I’ve went to church. I grew up did the whole go to, go to college, get married, get a, get a house, had a family. And now where’s the rest of this instruction booklet?
Like how to get through, the thirties, the forties, and for me coming up the fifties and so it’s one of the things where like the spirituality of self is ongoing development of where you are in life, like when when you’re older, you have older kids, you more worried about who they’re going to meet.
Sure. Are they going to be peers that are good for them, or as stressed out as Hey, my spouse and I, are we still on the same page? We spent our whole life, around the kids schedule and we adapted to that. Then now when we’re together and it’s empty nest, are we still the way we are?
Yeah. Do we know each other? Do we know each other? And that was questions because we had guys from all ages, from single to retirees And to widowers, you know who were there and they gave the advice or wisdom that they’ve gathered and is like This is a great platform to share, you know the group and then this is accelerated it to where you know The things we talked about in group also mimicked what we talked about this podcast was really an extension of the group, right?
It was always just man, let’s talk about this. I remember I would bring that bag of sins home and, we had 50, 55 guys come in a lot of those weeks. And so we had we kept adding a whole bag. Yeah. There was a lot of people, especially there in the beginning. And so what we found was I started looking around and some guys were sharing, some guys weren’t.
And a lot of the guys that weren’t were never sharing. And I figured, the Lord just shared with me, like they’re probably got something they’re struggling with. They’re embarrassed about, you just get put that thought in my mind one day. So we took those pieces of paper and took somebody’s ball cap and said, here, like, why these up dome in that hat?
And then we’re just going to draw them out. And I remember when I got home after the first or second night, like I opened them all up and laid them all out. And the thing that killed me that I remember laughing at was like, it’s all the same things. Even though we had 50 pieces of paper, there was like 20 that struggled with confession.
There was like 15 that struggled with alcohol. A bunch that struggled with pornography, work stress pride anger, unforgiveness. It was all the same thing. And it really helped to open my eyes of man, we are all living in different places and different ages and different types of life and all those things.
But we all struggle with the same stuff, right? We all start with the same stuff. And so what we, what the Lord allowed us to fall onto is this, like, where’s God in my mess kind of stuff is what people wanted to know. And these were men that were, some of them were going to church regularly. Some were not, some were addicted to things, some were not.
But what we found was we all had these commonalities, right? And that, This is where we wanted and needed to meet the Lord was to know that we weren’t alone and to know that other guys struggled too. And then we could figure and let our guard down, right? That vulnerability that was so impactful and still is today in this ministry and in that group that’s made it so different and really helped us launch what we’re doing now in parishes over the country.
But yeah, that was so neat because I was so excited every week to pull one of those things and go, all right, Victor, I pulled, confession, so let’s start digging into confession and what does the church say about it and how are we going to talk about it and why, what have we heard the men say, and guys would say I don’t want to admit what I’ve done or I’m tired of saying the same thing again and again.
And so when you, like you said, when you go back to the very beginning. One word episodes and that’s because it was one word. I told people don’t write a dissertation. There’s one word on the paper, just write what you’re struggling with in one or two words. And so that was the simplicity of the episodes in the beginning was just like confession.
Pride, anger, unforgiveness. So people could look and go, I struggle with that. Let me listen to that one. And it wouldn’t be some obscure title. We’re like, what does that mean? Now I’ve probably gotten into some of that now as we’ve gone along. But but yeah, it just, it’s something magical happened, man.
Like I know that you and I, we’re being honest with everybody. I don’t remember ever going dude, we’re going to do this and it’s going to take off and we’re going to be listening to all these countries. We were just prayerfully saying, Lord, We don’t know what we’re doing and you’re calling us to do it.
I still know what I’m doing either, but that’s the thing. If you go back to listen to the first, like three or four episodes, if there’s a hundred words in them, like 98 of them are probably I think I said, I think, and actually a lot, I probably, it was, I felt Oscar from the office where I come and say, actually, or someone, yeah, I would, I had a, I said, and write a lot so I would, I had to be very conscious of not being a parent and trying to like ease into a conversation, and, it takes a while cause I know when when you have guests come in from the group, like David and all them who did real good, and it’s, it’s different when you’re here on the table and people, people are going to listen to it.
Yeah. And you’re showing up every week. It’s hard to come in here every week and talk about something different, but That’s the thing. I remember worrying about that too, like going, man, we got 50 episodes. What else are we going to have to talk about? Cause we don’t always dive into the Summa and all these high theological things, which, the church is so full of that stuff that you could talk about something every week for the rest of your life and you’d be dead for, you got a halfway through the catechism.
That’s not our specialty. What we do is focus on where’s God in my life right now. And so we always, I remember thinking like, dude, what are we going to do where 38 episodes. Like I, I’m, I don’t have anything else. We’re running out of the bag and the Lord just invited us into trust.
And then we started looking at our own lives and going, you know what? This bag was full of struggles from everyday men’s lives and we’re everyday guys and we don’t get stuff right. We spend a lot of our time sharing before we ever get on the air about, man, Christie’s upset with me for this, or Angela’s upset for me to this, or I’m struggling to find a balance between work and home life, or I’m stressed out and handling it the wrong ways or whatever it is.
But that was the beauty of just letting go and letting God and even today we’re doing that. There’s a lot of times when we show up and we’re like, I don’t know, I think this is what the Lord wants us to talk about, especially you, because a lot of times I’ll prepare and then you just show up and you’re like, what are we talking about?
Yeah. So for those of you out there, whatever Victor’s contributing on every episode, which is always a lot. He’s doing on the fly. Like he doesn’t really, a lot of times have a, a two day ahead of time email saying, here’s all the points we’re going to use to request that. And, I remember going, Hey John, what are you gonna talk about?
And then I prepare something. I get back is now we’re doing something different. Yeah. And it wasn’t on purpose. No. So then I realized like, You know what? I’m just gonna I’m just gonna trust that, cause we always pray before we do this for the Holy Spirit to be present because it’s not about us.
We’re not driving this, this is something that we can just like, glory be to God that you want me here, and I’ve always told you, day one, I said, I will not be ever offended if this platform needs to go higher and further and you need somebody else in the chair.
Because I believe in you, and I believe in your ministry. And so it’s been a, it’s been great time for me to be here. But as you said I’ve learned a lot about my own I guess say, inadequacy wounds, from leaving the Presbyterian Church and be in that wilderness for a while and finding myself within the Catholic Church.
And so this has been a great landing pad for me to still be active in faith but also in some form of ministry. Because, when I left the Presbyterian Church going, what am I doing? What am I going to do? Because I was always like mission work or chaplaincy work or, pulpit supply in a small church in Marion, Arkansas.
And I love that. But like I said, I just felt like me being ordained in the Presbyterian Church USA was not where I needed to be. And I was like, I remember saying to the Presbyterian Church and my home Presbyterian area, I said, look, obviously we’re buddy heads and you want me to be.
Something that I can’t, fit myself to be. Yeah. And that’s okay. That’s okay. You there’s someone else I’ll probably take feel that need in that presbytery for those churches there and I was probably around 2000 I think I would say 2010 Where I just said, I not that I gave it up, but I said, I’m done with it.
And so for that period of time, and I became Catholic in 2017. So almost that six, seven years, I was Christian, I would go back and forth from Evergreen Presbyterian Church, across the street from Rhodes College. Sure. And then to like Holy Rosary or OLPH cause where her family’s from.
And I really enjoyed the Catholic faith. I really enjoyed The ambiance, the ceremony, the rituals and the traditions, and that’s what like really pulled me in to go, I want to know more about this. And of course, me being, a little bit of a theology nut, I knew that there was like the, the Summa Theological. Yeah. And I knew all these other, the Saints, but I didn’t know that There’s so much more Yeah. Information out there. So when I started like really diving deep within the Catholic tradition and the Catholic writings the writings of the Saints St. John the Cross Theresa Avila.
Just go on and on. Sure. There’s so many like beautiful like life stories that Saints have gone through to say, Hey, this was my struggle. Yeah. The lessons in their suffering. Lessons of suffering. And so that’s where I think we all come from a point of suffering in life that we all realize that, faith’s important.
Having a spiritual grip of what life’s all about is very important and essential because if you don’t have that, then you just wander like a tumbleweed. And like I said, for me, I think, getting up with you and the group and got to get into the Catholic faith was definitely like my anchor that I needed.
And I hope that, for our show is like for people listening that needed anchor in faith. This is something that pulls you back into the faith. Like if it’s a Catholic church, great. If it’s just going back to, your Baptist church or your Methodist church or, your Presbyterian home.
Great for you. We don’t, like I said we are open for everybody in the sense of brothers and sisters in the domination of faith. Just that where we found ourselves at the Catholic church is where it enriched us. Yeah. And it’s funny that you’re saying all that because I’m looking at a sheet here and it’s basically our most listened to episodes and like one of the very first ones is where do I even start?
That’s, and so you’re talking about that. You’re needing an anchor and trying to find a place. And we’ve tried to just, fall into that place and just receive that as our niche and the area that we work in, because the thing is we all struggle with the same stuff all the time. And you’re going to struggle your whole life.
Like you may be back this vice, but then another one pops up or things resurface and these wounds that. You might heal one wound, but then there’s four more waiting behind it. Like you don’t ever graduate from the simple things like healing and virtue and growing and knowledge of your faith and needing authentic friendship.
And that’s what the show has always tried to be about. And those were some of my favorite episodes when we did stuff like series on, okay, like where do I start and how do I become a disciple and here are these four or five steps that you got to start working and those things didn’t come out of a book.
Those came down to our learned experiences, right? Of Okay, this is what has to happen. You have to be vulnerable. What’s going on in your life? You have to then take it and repent and then you’ve got to replace bad habits with good habits and then you’ve got to persevere through those things and you’ve got to fully surrender and all of that stuff.
And even though it’s easy to say, it’s something that we all have to keep doing in our life each and every day. And you deal with uncertainty, you have needs for temperance you wonder why it’s so hard to live the faith. It’s easy to become complacent, right? You have to face your wounds.
These are all titles on this first page of stuff. What does your yes look like? What are you willing to do? The struggle with hope? What’s the process? All of those things are some of the most listed two episodes we ever had. And we’ve tried to stay in that vein. Because obviously there’s an audience and there’s a need for it.
And we’ve had so much fun along the way. Like I remember being in the studio and just laughing because Deacon Jeff would be like, all right, only have so much time. We got to get, that’s right. Yeah. I remember at the end, before he had the pre recorded intro and outro and I would always, yeah, and I would always write the The prayers, there I’d spontaneously just write a prayer that I thought had something to do with what we talked about.
And so sometimes that music would come on and I wasn’t able to get it all in before his voice started on the end. And he’s like, all right, hurry up, hurry. We’d have to do it 40 times. And we all laughed about that a bunch. I remember One episode when you it was in the very beginning and you’re like, I don’t know.
I’ve got to get in my mind palace yeah, right and that became a running joke for a year on the episodes of right and that’s the rooms in your mind Palace. That’s the thing being in my palace also gets me in trouble at Christy too because as I’m speaking right now You’re in the wrong room.
I apologize Christy because I thought I told her yesterday. I’ll be recording and and she’s a busy woman. So she had to go to Ella’s volleyball orientation. And I said, yeah, I’m here, I’m here, I told her that. And then I’m like, I thought I said, in my mind palace, I’m sure I, let me go back and rewind.
Did I tell her this or not? And more than most likely I did not. So this is my my, yes, that I know I probably, I know I didn’t. So I’d already texted her. So she’s fine. But like I said that’s the grace that comes in marriage too. Yeah. What are your, some of your favorite memories and stuff of doing this?
We’ve got, gosh, it just seems like I said, I never thought we’d be sitting here and listen to an over a hundred. 20 countries around the world and downloaded close to 600, 000 times or whatever it’s been. And man, I just never thought that. What are some of your favorite memories or things that we’ve done?
Yeah, I just like just the, five years thinking about it, here you lost your hair. I lost my vision five years, I didn’t have much to start with. And a lot has happened in a sense of that too, with, you go in full time. And then me having three jobs between then and know, and knowing the struggle where it’s work stress and life stress really could compound each other when you’re in a certain job.
And it’s okay to look for a job that doesn’t that allows you to have that. Comfortability because I finally found one right now. Sure. Yeah. Of course, watch next, next quarter. You never know. But like I said, it’s I’m blessed where I am right now and I’m still going to do behavioral health work for those in addiction work that need it.
And, some days when I go in to talk to therapists, I’m like, I feel like I’m wasting their time. But then when I get a call from a desperate parent or a person or a doctor Hey, I have a patient here right now needs help. And so that’s again, that is like an offset of kind of what we’re doing because, the form of ministry comes in many forms.
It’s by sitting and talking to someone, pick it up the phone and say, Hey, I’m just checking in. How you doing? All of us perform ministry, forms of ministries every day. We may not know it. And we may not say that’s not ministry, I’m just, I’m being a good friend or I’m being a good listener.
Or I’m just randomly helping someone open the door, help them get their stuff in and out. But what I like about the shows is that we’ve done is that it keeps me in check, to where I’m like, like I see a situation go, I remember this, from something we talked about or a life lesson that I learned that I’m able to like share with other people, like my trips.
to South Africa and Northern Ireland formed me so much, to where, me being pompous as a young kid, going I’m going in, I’m going to save the world, I’m going to change the world. And, and really what is that they, the culture changed me. Yeah. It shaped me to see what was really like, what poverty was really like.
What anger was really like, what the dilemma in humankind is that we don’t stop to listen to each other. And we were immediately angry with each other before we talked to each other. With, South Africa being apartheid, very racist over there, between the Afrikaans and then, and the the the, I guess you’d say native blacks over there.
And then in Northern Ireland with the Protestant Catholics, it’s so weird, like I said, those two places, the majority of people love each other, there’s a lot of people trying to change the world, like we’re trying to change the world as Christians. We’re reformatting the world and what Jesus taught us to do is love our neighbor.
Yeah. And our neighbors don’t always look the exact like ourselves. Yeah. Our neighbor may not believe the same way we believe. Our neighbor may not act the same way we believe. And we have to realize that, even in this country where, I hate to say it, the politics is so divisive that it’s hurting families.
My message to everybody is the story is already written. God has already written the story. Yeah. All we can do is do the best we can in there and live virtually in the everyday we have. Let’s not get so tied up and frustrated with what happens. Whatever happens, and let’s just take a step back and know we’re all Americans trying to work out this strange thing called democracy, it’s experiment.
And and that’s the thing about, Our faith is if you believe Christ is a son of God, you believe Christ will come back again. Just do the best you can while you’re here. Yeah. You have to live the way he’s called you to live. And then once you change behavior, yes. Yeah.
I’m saying, but like I said, it’s just it’s already written. And I just, ’cause I have a lot of people, I love my family that I disagree with some things, but I know that’s their perspective, that’s their opinions. Yeah. And I can’t change that. And that’s what, you’re talking about just growing and Yeah.
And learning from these episodes of things like that. And that’s, that’s really what it’s been for me a lot is just therapy, man. Like working through my own issues and going, you know what, if I struggle with this, other people probably do too. Yeah. And the one thing that we’ve never been afraid of.
Is to be honest about things. Y’all spent so much of my life lying, man. Like I never want to lie again. And when I catch myself doing that, even a small exaggeration, like I get so disgusted with myself because I spent so much time in my life lying. And so like people ask, like, how do you, man, y’all get on there and you just talk about stuff that like, I don’t hear anybody else like talking about I don’t hear speakers getting up there and saying I had to go to confession last week because I felt a pornography.
You’re not going to hear a lot of Catholic personalities admitting that. And it’s dude, I spent so much of my life lying. Wow, I’m not going to lie anymore. And you know what? I’m not perfect. And I don’t have everything figured out. And that’s the beauty of it. And that’s what I hope is the example that both of us are to people is man, these are just guys that are trying to figure this out along with us and that it is this relationship that we’re inviting people into to be a part of. And that’s why I’m always asking people to support our work and to look at what we’re really doing, because not only are we doing this over the airways, but we’re going out in these parishes and, I had a guy in I was in Scranton, Pennsylvania for a men’s conference with Deacon Harold Burke Sivers and some guys up there and, it was a couple hundred men there and.
I railed on confession a little bit at one of my talks about look It doesn’t matter what I say or what deacon herald says. It’s great stuff and it’s inspirational, you know If god’s working through us, yeah, But like you have two real opportunities for transformation in your life today it’s the eucharist at mass like receiving the lord in the eucharist But confession which is coming up next and I just harped on that like guys What are you hiding for?
What do you god knows what you’ve done? He knew what you’re gonna do before you were born all the stuff that we’ve talked about on here a bunch and this guy Came up to me, I was at the table and people were buying Rosaries and all that stuff and just you know saying they enjoyed the talk And this man came up in a tear in his eye and he basically told me that For the first time in 30 years, he had a full honest confession.
He’d been carrying something around for 30 years. And even though he’d gone to confession a bunch of times, he never really admitted that or never really confessed that. And he just broke down and I was like did you receive the Lord’s grace and mercy in that? And he just started crying and said, yeah.
And that’s the thing, man, I just this is where I think most people are in the world and in the country today Like they just need hope yeah, right and they need someone else to look to that’s been somewhere bad and gets out of it or someone that struggles in a way that like I feel inadequate too and how do you not feel that way and All of those things.
And they’re looking for somebody that can say, look, there’s a way out and there’s hope and there’s light. And, you’ll be able to breathe deeply again one day and things are going to get better. And it takes hard work on our part, but we need inspiration. And that’s all we’re trying to do.
Neither one of us like has degrees and all those things in theology. You were pretty close. You did a lot of studying, but like I, It’s honestly all this is born of the spirit of just saying like God I think you want us to talk about this and if you do then give us the words to say and that’s usually what we Pray every episode and this isn’t an episode as they look at us It’s just looking back on this time that we’ve spent together all these episodes and God willing hundreds more man Like where we can just continue to be inspired by God and meet people where they’re at and be a comfort to somebody on that drive into work, on that drive home in the gym when they’re in there working out by themselves, cutting the grass, on a walk after a fight with a wife, like whatever it is, like that we can be a voice for the Lord in their lives and continue to be that.
And, so I just want to, while we’re talking about that, thank everybody that’s listening. If you’ve ever listened to this once, or if it’s your first time, like There’s so much stuff out there to listen to. There’s a million Catholic podcasts and channels and the fact that you’re showing up here every week or whenever you remember to and listening to us or watching us on YouTube, it means the world to both of us.
And it really does because it makes us feel like what we’re doing isn’t a waste of time and it’s making a difference. And it’s just, I feel so lucky to be. Called to serve in the way that God has called us to serve. And that wouldn’t be possible if it wasn’t for the people that like, I can remember in the beginning, Victor, it’s okay, you got a nonprofit and, and we’re showing up at Deacon Jeff’s things, but there’s no money, there’s no this, there’s no that, and it’s wonderful people like our listeners that started giving and donating and, buying into the narrow road community when we were sending out the virtue books and when we were doing those extra videos and they gave us the leg up and the means to be able to continue to do this.
And. And I’m just so thankful. I don’t know that I always stop and say that enough, but to you people out there that listen and all you guys that have emailed and called in and written comments on YouTube, not the ugly ones, you guys, whatever but the good ones, the encouraging ones, the effort, the affirming ones.
Now, all of them. Thank you. Thank you for everybody. That’s taken that time to listen and just be a part of our lives. I really feel like we’ve got a big family of guys. And while we may not have faces with names just yet, it’s my hope and my prayers that. That one day we’ll be able to put faces with names and to meet a lot of you in person.
But yeah, it’s just been some of the greatest parts to me is just growing in my own faith through this just the coming in here and pouring my soul out as you do too, for people just to see that man, like just because you’re called to, to serve or to evangelize doesn’t mean you’re perfect.
Yeah. And that’s the thing, man, like God took us very small. Sort of half-hearted. Okay, we’ll try this. I don’t even say a full Yes. Yeah. But like, all right, we’ll give it a shot and look what he’s done with it. And it’s just amazing to see what the Lord can do with just that little Yes. And that’s always the crux of what we’re talking about.
Is what is God wanting from you? Where’s he wanting you to surrender? Where’s he wanting you to give more of yourself? And again, it’s scary. Like for the last five years of my life, I’ve lived not knowing if I’m going to be able to pay myself a lot of months, and support my family in this.
But the Lord continues to reveal that he is provider and that he is, he’s cares for us and the things that Jesus says in the gospels about knowing the hairs on your head and and. The way that he treats even the sparrows like God is here for all of us and he’s calling all of us to more and he’s inviting us to trust him that he’s going to be there.
He’s going to be that safety net. He’s going to catch us. He’s never going to invite us into something that if it’s really him doing it. Where he’s going to let us fall on our face because that’s contrary to anything that he wants and to the gospel, right? He wants us to go out and to call others and it’s been such a pleasure to do this here with you.
Same here, man. And you’re talking about it. I think we probably within the first year we realized our niche for the show or ministry was vulnerability. Cause we’re not a theological base where we’re, we’re not someone that would know everything about the Summa, and that’s great.
Cause go to those places, go to those, go to those shows that you’re interested in. And if we’re a stair stepper, we’re For you. And then you, and we’re, that’s awesome. If we’re just the basic food, the oatmeal of faith, that food for you, yeah, that’s right. We’re happy being that because I think, we’d rather be the ones that open the door and say, Hey, I was a captive once too of sin, and Christ sets you free, come and listen, be with us, and our group is that way.
And being a vulnerable is I think for men is. The most other than pride is probably the most difficult thing to get towards to be open even in our marriage, I think, I wasn’t totally vulnerable with Christy when we were first dating or even our first marriage, when we’re married first year marriage.
And then over time, I got to know what love, what really was like. Wow, this person really loves me for who I am, even all my faults, my, my insecurities and the inability for me to be everything that I think I would need to be for her. She still loves me, and that’s what God’s the same thing.
God loves us no matter what and what, all our we carry so much with us that we think that we’re not worthy of anything. And so we just drag our knuckles and put our head down when we go to mass saying, I’m here. I really don’t feel like I need to be here because we’re not giving everything to God.
We’re not like, say, you say, going to confession and we’re carrying something around forever that we’re not really releasing it or saying, God, take this from me, and that’s what I think this show is a great Stair stepper for people to come in. Yeah, no, it is. And that’s, you’re absolutely right.
Vulnerability and all those things are hard, man. It really is because the question we all wonder as men is, am I enough? And when you love somebody and you want to be with somebody, It’s hard to trust, whether it’s the Lord or with a good friend in your life or your wife or whatever it is it’s hard to trust because deep down all of us, because of the inadequacy wounds that we all have from the fall and things like that.
And the way a lot of us were raised is that question that we’re always asking is, am I enough? And we’re afraid that if we’re honest and we show somebody, we peel back the layers of the onion and show people there’s some rotted spots, there’s some bad spots that they’re going to go, you know what?
I didn’t sign up for this. Yeah. And thank God for Angela in my life and Christie in yours. Angela had every right to leave me and she didn’t. And you want to talk about coming into understanding a new kind of love is I can’t imagine anything now that Angela, like I have this understanding that Angela is going to love me through anything, but also I’m called to love her in that same way because of her love, right?
Because it’s not a one sided thing. And so it is very hard, but that’s exactly what’s transformative in our life. Catholicism and the faith isn’t just about showing up and going to church and checking boxes and just, letting faith be another thing you do in your life. Along with going to the grocery store and going to work and working out and all that stuff.
It’s the most important thing in your life and true Catholicism, true Christianity. Is in making these leaps and bounds and going into those dark places and going into those hard places And saying like i’m just gonna blindly trust in the lord and those that he’s put in my life To be here to love me to accept me and then I in turn am going to do those things for them that’s what the world you mentioned it earlier people fighting and strifing and not listening to each other and The world lacks relationship and that’s what we’re trying to promote during this podcast is accompaniment, right?
Just look, we’re not supposed to do life alone and life is more than about you. It’s more about your, more than about just your wants and your desires and your plans and your needs. We answer to a lord that has given his life for us and all he asked in return Is that we put others first and we live for others and that’s the thing that we’re trying to do through this and You know that’s something else I wanted to say before we wrap up here is just You know to all you folks out there.
I constantly get emails and people go i’m thinking the lord might be calling me to do this. I got a text yesterday from A friend of ours named Matt, that’s listened to the show forever. And he’s man, I’m thinking about quitting my job and going to the church, but I don’t like, I won’t, I don’t know how to support my family.
And I’m like welcome to the club, man. I didn’t know either. And, but you got to discern if that’s what the Lord wants. But what I would like to say is to people don’t ever discount what the Lord can do with anything. Because as we’ve recounted here over the last 35 minutes or so, Victor and I didn’t expect to be sitting here.
In 2024 on our 300th episode on our way to whatever the Lord gives us to do, and however many that is, like we didn’t, we thought, okay, we’re going to do this. And Deacon Jeff’s going to go like, all right, maybe I overstepped, maybe you had a little too, let’s take a break guys and never get back.
Yeah. He was at the center presumption. He had too much hope that we’d be able to do this, But we didn’t know and all we did was kept showing up every day and every week and just giving our yes and the shows that we didn’t think were good that’s what’s hilarious too. And we’re like, man, I don’t know if we should put that out and we had the courage to pray and put it out.
And those are some of the ones that we got the most comments ever on dude, this show was amazing. And we both thought dude, I don’t know, I’m worried about some of the things I said or. I messed up this, or I didn’t say this so I’m going to interpret what I said incorrectly. Yeah. And we put it out anyway.
And those are some of the most popular and the most commented on shows were just the imperfections, the things like that. And just showing up and going, you know what? We’re not, Born out of a machine and a robot, we’re broken people that don’t always say things perfectly, that don’t always have the right words that come out, but God still can use those things to do beautiful things.
And so for any of you out there that are feeling, that are, you’re feeling the Lord calling you, like so many guys will say, I want to start a men’s group, but I’m afraid, do it. Cause God’s not going to leave you alone. He’s not going to leave you there abandoned. He’s going to put things and tools and people in your life.
The way he put Victor in my life to help me do this and the way he’s put so many others in and Deacon Jeff and all the people that have been responsible for this podcast or built any part of this ministry. He’s going to do that for all of us. So I would encourage everybody like just to throw caution to the wind.
Don’t be. Stupid and run out there and without praying and thinking But spend time with your wife and people and if the lord is calling you to things Then have the courage to boldly take that first step and if that step doesn’t work out Don’t retract look for the next step. Maybe it’s in a different direction Maybe the stones to the right or the left instead of straight in front of you But continue to step out there for what the lord’s calling you to because you were made for greatness Our favorite quote right the quote that’s been this part of the show forever Is you were not made for comfort you were made for greatness.
The world offers you comfort But you weren’t made for that. You were made for greatness. And this show has been an opportunity for you and I to try to live as out of comfort and to try to be great. There’s probably a lot of people say you got a lot of work to do to be great. You’re still not good yet, but.
But we’re trying and for those of you out there that feel the call of the lord to do something similar Or to get out there and to do something different than you’re doing Don’t be afraid is what i’m saying because it doesn’t matter what you think It doesn’t matter what your fears and doubts are it matters that if you feel god’s calling you All you have to do is just pray, ask Him to give you the grace and the gifts to be able to do it, and then go out and try it.
And if it doesn’t work out, try something else. That’s how we found our way into starting men’s groups and everything else. We kept trying things until we found what the Lord wanted us to do. Now we’re doing it and the ministry’s been blessed in a way that it never has before. So there’s all those opportunities out there for you.
But Victor, like none of this would be possible without you. And I just want to tell you that again, man, like it has been a joy of my life to grow in friendship with you and relationship with you to be in here every week on the weeks when we’re mad and we’re upset and we don’t feel like doing this or we’re embarrassed about things that we’re going to talk about or just.
Just, man, doing life together, sitting on the patio out there, having a cigar and laughing you’ve been such a gift in my life. And I know that you’ve been a gift to all these people that I’ve listened to because many people have told me. So thank you for giving, 300 plus hours of your life to this ministry and to this work and to this friendship because I’m a better man because of it.
I appreciate and the same goes to you as well. I didn’t know where to land in my formation of ministry, my formation of faith because there was darkness for a while. Me just wondering our God, I thought you wanted me to do this and the door closed on that and I thank you for allowing the opportunity for me to sit here and share with everybody, the formation of my faith but also the formation of my life and My spiritual development and then, and hopefully sharing that together we put a product out for people to go, Hey, that’s just like me.
Because I think when we all realize that I’m not the only one dealing with this that I’m not unique in this, then we become like a formation of a partnership. And that’s what we are. I think we want to be seen as your partner, and help you go down that road of life because there’s always gonna be something to happen where, a sickness of a child when you’re worried about.
Is it more than that? Loss of a job, what’s going to happen? Fear of being sick or Just the life of repetitive sins and the tragedies of life and all the things, just the daily things of constant wearing you down a weathered rock, Lord, where’s my reprieve from everything?
Come to us, listen to us. We don’t have all the answers, but we have, we can share something with you. That’s the thing I think we’re both trying to be and what we’ve always tried to be is just ministers of hope, man. Like you’re going to see through it. You’re going to see through it.
You’re going to get through things. The Lord is going to give you everything you need. And we just need to be reminded of that. And each and every week, that’s what we try to do is, all right, what is the Lord saying? What did we read in scripture? What did father say at a mass? What is something that a breakthrough in our own lives that we just want to share?
Because we know again, we’re all the same. We may look different, sound different. And we’re all children of God and we’re all human beings. We all struggle with the same things. The fall was the great equalizer for all of us, right? Like we all struggle. We all fall short of the glory of God. And we can rise up together to be the disciples we’re called to be.
But by being honest, by being open, by sharing our lives with one another and growing in relationships so that we can meet him, that’s how you meet Jesus. You meet him through each other. Amen. Amen. And that willingness to be a guide or to be someone that’s being walked with and the faith, and that’s what this ministry was always supposed to be.
The tagline from the beginning was welcome to the pew, the place where everyday guys talk about everyday things in front of the one person that could do something about it, Jesus Christ, and that’s what it’s always going to continue to be. And again, I just, as we close out here. Folks thanks for listening to us.
I know there wasn’t probably some great profound spiritual knowledge It was passed on during this episode or something, there weren’t any how to’s other than Just go out and do what God’s asking you to do, but it’s been a pleasure on behalf of Victor and myself to be with you for all these years.
And we look forward to continuing to grow with you and to walk with you. I want to say thank you to each and every one of you that have given any amount of money to this ministry, whether it was one time or monthly or bought a rosary or a shirt or a mug, or just sent a check and said, Hey, Thank you for what you’re doing.
It’s helped me. Here you go. Help somebody else. Thank you. Each and every one of you. And for any of you that want to be a part of this journey, right? This team, as Victor said, of men that are out there helping other people. You can do that. If you’re asking right now, like, how did, how does God want me to help?
Maybe it’s sharing this podcast with somebody. Maybe it’s saying, Hey man, you struggling, listen to this and subscribe to this, send them one of your favorite episodes to guy, is struggling subscribe and share on the YouTube channel. Or if you feel led and you have the means, I know it’s tough right now with inflation and the world upside down, but if you have the means and you just want to help support us to grow, then you’re welcome to do that.
But thank you for all of you who have all of you that will And for those of you that are yet to listen that will one day we thank you all For your time for your talent for your treasure and for your friendship So victor, let’s take all this to prayer and end this episode 300 with our 300th prayer In the name of the father and the son and the holy spirit.
Amen Heavenly Father, you are so good and you are so gracious and you take things that are inept and things that are broken and things that aren’t perfect and you make them whole. Lord, thank you for using Victor and I through all these episodes and all these years to help people and most importantly to help ourselves, right?
That’s been a huge part of this, Lord, is not just getting on here and helping others, but you’ve grown us through our own mistakes and our failures and Lord, you’ve helped us to see that those things don’t, they don’t define us. They’re stepping stones. They’re paragraphs on a. on a page in a book that has got so many more pages to be written.
So Lord, we thank you for all these people that have listened. We thank you for our brothers in arms out there that are trying to live the faith each and every day. Help us to continue to give them hope. Help us to continue to share your mercy and your grace with the people that listen. Lord, thank you for our families, for the show, for this ministry, and for everything that you’ve done in our lives.
In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, Amen. Thanks for listening to Just a Guy in the Pew. To find out more about John Edwards, or have him come to speak to your Or parish, group, or conference. Go to justaguyinthepew. com or send us an email at justaguyinthepew at gmail. com.